Mari Ness - Ok, as long as we're all in full confession mode here:

I admit it. It's true. I am bisexual. I also had a torrid affair with a Venezuelan. (ok, not all that torrid.)

I fear, however, that the storied reports currently told of me, two lemons, a donkey, Brad Pitt's underwear, and the daring clown kidnapping scam and how this was all completely destroyed by a Japanese yodeler and my inability to use artificial sweetener are, sadly, currently uncorroborated.

This has been a public service announcement.